Tuesday, February 28, 2012

June 29th 2008

On Ryan and I's 3rd date, we went on a drive up to northern Missouri. On the way there, he told me to pick up this book (a book full of daily devotionals from the sweet man in the picture). It was June 29th, and the title of the thought for that day was "Eternal Companions."
First I thought he planned it, but as I read it outloud to him, the mood in the car quickly went from happy to uncomfortable, & I realized he hadn't planned that at all.
It was our third date. We were 18. Marriage was still gross.
I remember getting this very subtle feeling, almost like a nudge, that was saying,
"Yeah, that is totally your eternal companion sitting right next to you."
I looked at Ryan and thought, "Him????!!!!!!"
He is not what I pictured my future husband to be. But he is so good. He doesn't do things the way I would. He pushes my buttons and frustrates me to all heavenly heck. But, he is so good. He has the best heart, the best laugh, and the best intentions. He is good when I am not, and
I am getting MARRIED to him!
I guess you could say it finally hit me.
If you see me, and ask me if I'm excited, I WILL start crying.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Oh! the drama

2 weeks out and we already have tears. 
[Aren't I going to have the cutest little flower girls ever?] 
I feel a slight sense of responsibility to record how I am feeling 2 weeks before my wedding. 
I guess a better way to say it is, what am I not feeling? 
Happy. Excited. Scared. Nervous. Stressed. Fat. Bloated. Lovey-Dovey. Don't touch me. It smells in here. I'm hungry, not really, but I still want to eat. 
I can't even focus on finishing describing my emotions. My brain is in 5 different places and I'm not sure if it's really, truly hit me yet. Although sometimes when Ryan talks to me about hotel reservations AFTER March 9th, I know I want to throw up. 
In a good way. 

Monday, February 20, 2012

"Honey badger don't care"

The past few days I have bust into tears randomly for stupid reasons. 
I have questioned a lot more. And doubted. And thought more than once a day
It's like the whole universe knows I'm getting married and wants to stop me from doing so. 
IT'S SO FRUSTRATING. We all know where this "opposition" is "coming from" 
Seriously though, it's getting old. 

But today we went to Cabella's and I saw a stuffed honey badger & it reminded me of this video. 
[warning: there's some raunchy language]

If honey badgers don't care, then I'm not going to either. 

[i'm praciting my "i dont care" face] 

And I'm also going to practice running backwards and eating live snakes. 

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Heart day!

Happy Valentines Day to him...

.....and me: 

2 weeks ago I got my appendix out. 2 days ago I caught that stupid winter bug that everyone gets but still makes you feel like poo. And yesterday I found out I have (mild) scoliosis! 
I'm pretty sure Ryan is reconsidering marrying this walking mess. 
The only cure for all this madness is diet coke, I am convinced. 

Despite the tone of this post, I really do love my life...and I'm having a wonderful Valentine's Day.
 I talked Ryan into going to see The Vow. 
It's a St. Valentine's Miracle! 

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Guess what we did...

We dressed up all fancy and pretended like we were married. Here's an itty bitty shot, gosh darn I can't show you the whole thing just yet. That's bad luck right? I also heard its bad luck to let your fiancé pick up your dress from the cleaners and to let him see you in it before the actual wedding day. Considering both of those things have happened, you might say we're SOL.
We better throw some salt behind us or something.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Do you want to see what I'll look like 1-2 months pregnant?

I have to fit into my wedding dress in T minus 3 days. Ryan suggested we poke holes in my belly to empty all the air out, or stick a suction vacuum up my bum hole. Any votes?
I'm actually growing quite fond of my air baby. Last night I had a dream about giving birth and I was a little disappointed when I woke up and it wasn't real. 

Flowers make the pain go away...

...as well as getting pushed around by a hottie in a wheelchair. 
The past few days have been spent trying to figure out how girls look cute when they're "dressing down." 
When I dress down, I seriously dress down, and it is a mystery to me how some girls do it while still looking hot. Any suggestions? Ryan is grossed out when I dress down. We are going on day 5. It's not pretty. 
Oh, the mysteries of life.